Know This: You Are Not Supposed to be Great at the Beginning

By Julie Isphording

Everyone wants to be great at something. No one dreams of being average. 

But it’s incredibly difficult to get started on that “greatness.”  

When we look at the situation through the lens of reality and must admit that we will be bad at the beginning—and maybe for months, years, and sometimes decades ahead—it can be showstopping.

But don’t stop the show. There’s lots of good stuff ahead, just by moving forward.

Once we realize that it’s okay to be bad at something the first time we try it, we give ourselves the freedom to experiment more, fail more, and try new, creative things. 

But the most important thing to remember is that you have to start.

Zig Ziglar said it best: “You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.”

Our true potential is something that we will unfold with grace through time, love, presence, energy, curiosity, and painstaking effort. 

One day, I’d like people to think of me and say, “Julie Isphording is a great writer.” But that day isn’t here yet. So, I’ll just keep writing.

And what about you? I say, just start and go after each day. 

To-Day matters. 

Are you living with integrity? 

Every day, you face the same two choices, repeatedly:

• I made a promise to myself or others. Will I keep it?
• I know what’s right. Will I do it?

When you answer ‘yes’ to these questions, you’re living with integrity. It is the alignment between your words and your actions. I love how the poet Kenneth Koch describes the power of integrity: “For every star in the sky

Someone is holding his ground.”

What are some simple and effective ways to improve your connections with others?

• When you like someone, greet them warmly, kindly, and with a smile.

• Try your best to give the other person your total focus while paying remarkably close attention to what they are saying—and how they are saying it—knowing that what they are saying is something worth listening to.

• When you disagree with a friend about something important, ask questions until you deeply understand their perspective. If you still disagree, express that disagreement gently while pointing out the parts you agree about before exploring what you disagree about.

• If a close friend does something that bothers you and it is out of character for them, just let it go. 

• Try to balance the amount of time you spend speaking vs. the amount of time the other person spends speaking so that it doesn’t go outside of the 40%-60% range. 

• When you think a nice thought about someone, tell them the nice thought. As the saying goes, thinking something nice about someone and not telling them is like wrapping a nice present but then never giving it.

• Don’t complain about how old you are unless you’re sure that you’re the oldest person in earshot by a significant margin.

What are the benefits of quiet time and rest?

• Healthier body. 

We each get one life and one body to live it in. Therefore, we eat healthy, we exercise, and we watch our unhealthy habits. But then we allow our schedules to fill up from morning to evening. Rest is as essential to our physical health as the water we drink and the air we breathe.

• Less stress. 

Stress is the perception that the situations we are facing are greater than the resources we must deal with—resources such as time, energy, ability, and help from others. Concentrated rest confronts stress in two ways. First, it reduces the demands of the situation. We have no demands on us if we can mentally let go of unfinished tasks. Secondly, rest reduces stress by increasing our resources, particularly energy.

• Deeper relationships. 

Rest allows relationships with people to deepen and be strengthened. When we aren’t rushing, we are able to enjoy each other’s company and a healthy conversation. 

• Opportunity for reflection. 

Concentrated rest allows us to take a step back, to evaluate our lives, to identify our values, and determine if our life is being lived for them.

• Increased productivity. 

Just like resting physical muscles allows them the opportunity to rejuvenate which leads to greater physical success, providing our minds with rest provides an opportunity to refocus and rejuvenate. More work is not better work. Smarter work is better work.

• Reserve for life’s emergencies. 

Crisis hits everyone. Nobody who is alive is immune from the trials of life. By starting the discipline today of concentrated rest, you will build up reserves for when the unexpected emergencies of life strike and rest is no longer an option.

Feeling Cranky? 

Drink up! If your energy is simply dying or you just can’t seem to get out from under the dark cloud that’s been following you around all day, the answer to energy may be in a tall, cool glass of water. Two recent studies suggest that even mild dehydration—as little as a 1.5 percent loss of normal water volume—can cause a host of problems, including headaches, fatigue, difficulty concentrating and a bad mood. 

Olympian Julie Isphording is the director of the Western & Southern Thanksgiving Day Race, an author, and keynote speaker. Her speeches on living a happy life include unforgettable props, lots of laughter, and a few tears. Write to her at julie.isphording@gmail.com.